Love Is Louder Read online

  Hugging her camera and purse to her side, she tips her head back a little to meet my gaze.

  “Mason. So nice to see you again,” she acknowledges with a smile as a sexy pink tint dusts her high cheekbones.

  “Brie, the pleasure is all mine.” I nod and offer my hand to her because, dammit, I want to feel her.

  Her eyes fall to my hand, and a beat passes before she inches her fingers toward mine and wraps them around my own. At the moment of contact, the warmth of her touch incites a craving that travels through my body. A small part of me wants to take her away so I can find out what she’s about. I want to know her in every way.

  “What are you up to?”

  I force a grin as I compose myself and get my thoughts back in order to answer. I’m losing my damn mind. “Service call.” I glance into the large floor-length window, catching a couple of women studying us. “Air conditioner.”

  “Oh.” A light laugh breaks from her, and her eyes warm as she pulls her hand away, waving at one of the females who is watching us with curiosity. “That’s good, because it can get pretty hot during yoga class.”

  Fuck, what I wouldn’t do just to take her face in my hands and kiss her.

  Follow the rule. Stupid fucking rule, asshole. No physical relations with married women.

  But, I can look.

  She’s positively captivating, from her olive skin to her chestnut brown hair that flows down the curve of her high full breasts. If it weren’t for that service call that James called in—thank you, fucking James—I would never have known she existed. Of all the fucking guys, what a shame she ended up with James.

  I find myself studying her as a stray piece of her hair blows across her cheek. I want to take that strand of hair and wrap it around my finger. Foolishly, I want nothing more than to have my hands on her, possessing her. I want her legs wrapped around my waist, and her hands raking down my back as I pleasure her. I want to know what her voice sounds like when she screams my name when I take her to the edge. I want to feel her fingers pulling my hair, her soft lips on mine. I want to know what makes her feel good.

  Everything.

  I try to appear unaffected, but there’s something about her that draws me to her. Is it the fact she’s with James, or is it because I could possibly feel some sort of attraction? No, it has nothing to do with that asshole. It’s her. There would be something seriously wrong with me if I weren’t drawn to her. My gaze settles on her pearl necklace and then travels up the smooth column of her neck, her rosy lips, her pert nose, and then to her brown eyes that have been watching me the whole time.

  I got my answer.

  It’s her eyes. Her eyes have captured me like a web, and I’m not sure I want to escape.

  They have secrets they shouldn’t have. We all have secrets, but hers look sad and inviting, all enclosed in an appealing package. She nervously clears her throat and shifts the bag on her shoulder.

  “So, you know James. He never talks about his old friends.”

  “Yeah, we knew each other in high school, but we weren’t exactly friends, though.”

  “I can relate to that.” She nods her head knowingly. “Well, I hope whatever it was or is, you guys can work through it and be friends.”

  “Maybe. Someday,” I force out. I’ll say whatever she wants me to say as long as I can see the smile that kisses her face this very second.

  “We can’t live in the past.”

  Her words sting. The past equals Meadow, and I will never let go of her and other things. Can’t. Go. Back.

  A rapid tapping on the gym window interrupts our conversation, but Brie’s eyes don’t leave my face for a second. Turning toward the window, I see a pretty brunette with green eyes looking between us and tapping her wrist. Brie finally turns her head to the commotion and shakes her head in mock amusement. I quickly realize this must be her friend.

  “Sorry about my friend. She’s a little nosy and nutty.”

  The blush on her cheeks is no longer pink, but a deep shade of crimson due to her curious yoga buddy. She fingers her necklace and waves away her friend. Standing in front of her like this is driving me crazy. If I don’t leave her soon, I may end up breaking that ridiculous rule.

  “Could be the heat in the yoga room.” I laugh.

  “That, too.”

  “Speaking of heat, I think I better get in there and take a look at the air conditioner, and maybe you should meet your friend before she loses her mind.” I open the door to the gym and bow at the waist.

  She laughs at my chivalrous behavior, rewarding me with the most genuine smile. “Thank you.”

  “My pleasure.” I return her smile before she disappears down the hall into the locker room.

  She carries herself with a quiet confidence and innocence I find so damn irresistible. I’ve got to cut this shit. James. I don’t want trouble. I need to walk away and stop having these thoughts. She’s off limits. I feel defeat and disappointment because nothing can happen.

  I head to the front desk where the owner is eagerly waiting for me. She leans over the desk with her chin cradled in her hands, and her eyes brighten as I approach. She gracefully stands at her full height to greet me, revealing how yoga has enhanced her curvy and lean physique. I try not to mix business with pleasure, but this little gig at the yoga studio can definitely boost both for me. I have to be discreet. Business first.

  I’ve unequivocally become a supporter of yoga.

  The overpowering pull to turn around and get one last glimpse of Mason before I went into the locker room was a test in restraint, but I battled through. Instead, I focused my mind on my yoga class, the oppressive heat of the room, and making sure I nailed each new pose to shake his image from my head.

  I finally have to admit to myself that he takes my breath away. His entire presence has a way of throwing me off balance. I notice the way his brown eyes darken as if he can read my thoughts and the tingle that runs under my skin when he touches me. It’s like little shockwaves that are still alive in my veins, waiting for the next charge. The ideas touching the fringes of my mind are extremely unnerving and invigorating at the same time.

  Attraction is a natural part of being human, and the more I fight it, the more tempting it becomes. Honestly, I don’t think anything can dim the tight ball of desire rolling around in my stomach when I see Mason. It’s pointless avoidance. It’s like we are being pulled to each other with an invisible rope.

  I need to stop.

  I have James.

  I inhale a deep breath and smile, catching the sparkle in my diamond ring as I roll up my purple yoga mat. My love for James is strong enough to survive whatever we are going through. We’re working on it now. We just need to move forward and keep whatever it was that was bothering him in the past. Mason should be the last thing on my mind, but I keep running into him and getting bombarded by a plethora of emotions.

  “Who the hell was that?” Ava asks in a breathy voice after our intense yoga class. She nudges my shoulder as we enter the dressing room to grab our things.”Hello?”

  Coming out of my reverie, I realize I have tuned out Ava with my thoughts about the current state of my marriage and Mason.

  “Sorry, Ava. What were you saying?” I give her a dazed smile as I twirl my ponytail with my finger. She tilts her head and narrows her eyes at me.

  “That guy. Who was he?” She puts on a mischievous smile, grabs her things from her locker, and tugs on my arm.

  “The repairman who came to fix my washing machine last week,” I answer nonchalantly as I pull my bag and camera out of my locker, even though my insides are fluttering at the mere thought of Mason. I can’t have him, and he can’t have me.

  “The what?” she exclaims, as other women in the gym look on like we are a couple of teenagers gossiping. “You had Mr. Sex-on-Legs working in your house, and you didn’t tell me?” she whisper hisses, throwing her bag onto her shoulder. “Did you take pictures? Tell me you did?” She swings open the door, lett
ing the muggy summer evening air blanket our already warm bodies.

  Ava the flirt. She goes on dates like I go through flavors of ice cream. She’s insatiable. I’m sure Mason would love her and her willing and outgoing demeanor. Actually, most men can’t get enough of her infectious personality.

  “Ava...no.” Bemused and conflicted, my mind skips back to my encounter with him as I swallow back my unease. Whatever this is I’m feeling will probably fade as time goes—one of those out of sight out of mind type of things. At least I hope so. I fixate my attention to my car in the parking lot before I reply, “I’m not going to—”

  “To what?” she interrupts, walking beside me. “No, you need to hook me up. He’s so fuckable. I need to meet him.”

  I wince, twisting the ring on my finger as we arrive at our cars.

  “I don’t know him to be playing matchmaker for you two. Looking so ‘fuckable,’ he probably has a girlfriend,” I say, using air quotes. The fact I feel a twinge of envy is foreign to me since I’ve been with James. I’m confounded by my reaction to some guy who’s a complete stranger to me.

  “Fine. I’m going to break something. That’s a good way to get him to my place.”

  “I’m sure lots of women have tried that.” I hit my fob to unlock the door to my Black Acura TL.

  What are you so upset for? The same thought ran through your head, too.

  “I don’t care.” She smiles as she opens the door to her Mercedes parked next to my car. “Nothing ventured, nothing gained, and this girl,” she throws her things into the front seat and points to herself before continuing, “will love to take that adventure over and over and over—”

  “I get it,” I interject as she slips into the front seat of her car. “You want him probably just like every other woman in the dressing room today and all his past female customers.”

  “Always looking for the next best thing. And, he is definitely it.” She winks “You know me.”

  “Yes. Yes, I do.” Shaking my head in amusement, I plop behind the wheel of my car and roll down the window. “I’ll talk to you later.”

  “Bye, babe,” she says, blowing me an air kiss. “Same time tomorrow?”

  “Yep.”

  “See you then.” She shuts her car door and immediately gets on her phone, probably confirming her date tonight with the gym guy or whatever guy she’s managed to snare.

  Tossing my purse onto the passenger seat, I close my eyes and lean back in my seat to catch my bearings before I head home. Today’s yoga class was a little bit more than I could handle, which I partially blame on the broken air conditioner, but I’m confident that Mason will be able to get it working again for my next class.

  I’m anxious to get home after this long day. To say the day at the photo studio was busy is an understatement. So many births, so many engagements to shoot. Today was actually one of my slower days since one appointment had to cancel. I didn’t realize how much work owning my own photo studio was going to be, but I love it. I enjoy the challenge more than anything. I’ve gotten so many new customers over the last few weeks that I’m booked for the next two months. This is what I wanted all along.

  I’ve been considering doing weddings after a newly engaged couple approached me about doing theirs, but it would involve hiring more staff and purchasing more equipment. With the level of business already, I believe it is totally feasible. James would support my plans. He always has. He was the one that actually helped me find the space for the studio.

  My moment of quiet contemplation is shattered when my phone rings. Popping my eyes open, I quickly reach for my phone in my purse.

  “Hello?”

  “Babe, it’s me.”

  “Hey, I missed you today,” I say in a gentle tone. My body weeps for him. I hope he’s not working late at the office again. Since he wants to work on saving our marriage, he’s made more of an attempt to be home at a decent hour.

  “Come home. I got out of the office early.” His deep voice rumbles into the phone, causing my entire body to tingle with want, as if he’s reading my thoughts, or perhaps we’re both on the same page. “I haven’t been able to get you out of my head today.”

  He is.

  My pulse spikes as excitement builds inside me. Hearing his words is making me wet. I want to go home and have him between my legs tasting me. Holding the phone between my shoulder and ear, I buckle my seatbelt and start the car. I didn’t take a shower after my yoga class, so I hope James is open to joining me, too.

  “I’ll be right there,” I confirm as I pull out of the parking lot and check for oncoming traffic.

  “See you soon, babe.”

  “Love you.” I hang up and pull onto the main street when everything is clear. I turn on the radio as Neon Tree’s “Everybody Talks” flows from the speakers once I stop at the red light. Tapping my hands on the steering wheel, I wait for the light to turn green, thinking about James waiting for me at home while soaking in the hustle and bustle on this warm summer day. My fairy tale can still be saved.

  My heartbeat accelerates, and my fingers throb as they tighten around the steering wheel. I can’t understand why my body automatically seizes up on me at the sight of him.

  At this moment, Mason’s muscular, tanned arm is draped around a pretty brunette in front of the floral shop, Lily of the Meadow. My attention lingers on them while they chat comfortably. As she hands him a bouquet of lilies, he laughs before kissing her on the cheek. I swallow what is a swirl of emotions I cannot comprehend—the thrumming heart and the clammy hands—all triggered by this stranger who happens to know my husband and whom I happen to be attracted to.

  I’m so lost in my thoughts that the impatient driver behind me lays on their horn, jerking me from my daze and causing several unwanted stares in my directions, including Mason’s.

  We stare at each other, and the temperature inside my car seems to skyrocket. I can feel the heat of his gaze run through my body. It’s as if we were the only two people in the universe in that moment.

  A smirk dusts his lips.

  I blink my eyes…one, two times.

  Giving him a short, clipped wave, I gently hit the gas and drive past. Quickly averting my eyes from his, I slowly put distance between the embarrassing situation and us.

  I furrow my brow as butterflies jump in my stomach. This is messed up. I was caught staring at him like a dumb ass while causing a fucking traffic jam. It doesn’t help that my mind is still captured by him.

  Why does it matter that he is with someone?

  It doesn’t. I try to convince myself.

  I turn up the radio to kill my thoughts and listen to Pharrell Williams sing “Happy.” That’s what I am. Happy that my husband wants me home and wants me again. I guess now I’m going to have to break the bad news to Ava that ‘Mr. Fuckable Sex-on-Legs’ is taken. I know she’s going to be extremely disappointed, and honestly, I feel it a tiny bit, too.

  “James,” I call out, setting my things down onto the living room sofa before checking the mail neatly piled on the coffee table. There’s no answer. My voice echoes in the cavernous quiet house as music flows from the back. The grandfather clock chimes, signaling that it’s six o’clock, which is early for James. It makes me warm inside, causing an ache for him to blossom. I pick up his coat that’s lying across the couch and hold it to my nose, inhaling his familiar scent. His briefcase sits next to the couch, and his wallet and keys are on the table. Life has gone back to normal. I have to remind myself that we had a momentary setback and that it will not ruin my forever. I want to feel that love with him, and I want him to feel it and believe it, because we’re worth it.

  Setting his jacket down, I soak in the furnished room with large white pillars, creamy white walls, and a white sofa with black and white throw pillows accented in red. I never finished decorating the room. I didn’t have it in me after James and I drifted apart. Why decorate a house when the other person doesn’t want to be there?

  I follow the musi
c down the hallway and through the kitchen to open the French doors that lead to the back patio. It’s serene, and the air has cooled to a perfect temperature. The sounds of splashing water, crickets, my breathing, and faint fireworks in the distance fill the night air. I slip off my sneakers and socks and set them near the lounge chair as I admire James.

  His powerful arms slice through the water as he swims several laps. When he finishes, he emerges from the water like a Greek god, revealing his taut abs and muscular chest dripping with beads of water. I let out a deep breath, and my core clenches watching him for several seconds. He must have heard me because his eyes heat before a devious grin lights up his face. He strides purposefully to the wall with the last of the sun falling across his strong features.

  “How long have you been standing there?” He strokes his jaw while his eyes rake over my body.

  “Not long.” I pause, pulling my hair out of my ponytail, placing the elastic band around my wrist. “How was work?”

  “Busy, and you?” he asks, placing his hands onto the edge of the pool so that the sinewy muscles in his biceps and triceps pulse with power. He smiles, allowing his dimple to pop out.

  “Busy as usual with engagements and newborns.” I notice the way his brow creases at the mention of babies, and it makes me sad. Why should I hold back? We haven’t talked about having a baby since we moved back here. I want to discuss it, but I want to take things slowly. We still have time.

  “Get over here,” he says, quickly changing the subject. Avoidance is his defense mechanism, and I’m not in the mood to argue. We just started to rebuild our relationship. I have to be patient and make sacrifices.

  Has James made any for me? Will he?

  “You had yoga class tonight?” James’ lips curve into a slow, sexy smile, and his eyes darken seductively. I can stare at him for hours and never tire of how he makes me feel at this moment. Possessed and obsessed. I never felt this way for another human being.