Love Is Louder Read online

  “So…no big city for you?” I pick up the conversation where we left off.

  “We tried. In Boston and New York City right after college,” she replies, avoiding my eyes. “James thought we needed to move here, somewhere less chaotic for a little while.”

  “How long have you been living in town?”

  A beat passes as my gaze delves into hers, revealing traces of pain and anger, like a cloud blocking the sun, feelings and desires she’s been trained to hide.

  “We moved here about a year ago when James got the district attorney’s job. While he was doing that, I was trying to establish myself. Keeping busy.” She peers around the studio, folding her arms across her chest. “This is my baby.”

  “Sounds like you spend a lot of time here.”

  She drops her arms slowly to her side.

  “Yes, business has been great. I may need to hire a couple of assistants, but for now, I’m doing okay. I like to spend this time alone.”

  “You don’t want to burn yourself out.”

  “Photography is my passion. It’ll never bore or burn me. It’s the one thing I can make my own. When I’m behind the camera, I dictate how I want the world to look. It’s how I perceive it. No one can tell me otherwise.”

  She draws in a breath, struggling with something I wish she would share with me. I lose myself in her sad beauty. I watch her watching me. Something is off, but I can’t quite figure out what. I want to know what’s causing the dark shadow to cross her features like a ghost. I wish I could find out more about her. I wish for so many things, and one of them is her. I need more time with her. More talking. More everything. I want to reach out and touch her and protect her from whatever it is.

  I shove my selfish thoughts away. “My sister loved to take pictures. You would have liked her,” I murmur, sliding my hands into my pockets.

  “Liked?” she asks in a gentle voice.

  I never open up about Meadow, especially to someone I barely even know, but talking to her seems so natural. “She passed away four years ago.”

  This is a first, talking about my sister.

  “I’m sorry to hear that,” she replies solemnly, touching my arm to comfort me.

  I look down at where her hand made contact with my skin and back up at her.

  “Yes, it was hard.”

  I glace at Lily sitting on the floor, not sure what to do now or what to say next. I can’t do this anymore. I can’t speak of Meadow if I am going to feel so broken up about it. Speaking of her should make me happy, and it does at times, but the fact her death is still a mystery bothers me. I’m locked in an internal debate, trying to rationalize and fight these emotions when my phone starts ringing. I retrieve it from my back pocket and frown when Cindy’s name pops up. Brie looks up and retreats a step like she’s crossed an imaginary boundary, while I glance at my phone.

  “I have to take this call.”

  Cindy rarely calls me during the day. There must be something going down at the flower shop.

  “Of course.” She nods. My thoughts, probably the same as hers, are interrupted by the connection we both feel. I don’t want to be wrong about this, but then again, it’s not like we can pursue whatever it is.

  I swallow and answer the phone, “Hey, Cindy, can I call you in a bit? I’m picking up Lily.” I listen to Cindy ramble about a flower shipment not arriving on time for a wedding this weekend. “I’ll be right there. Calm down,” I reassure her, trying to talk her off the ledge. Never once do I take my eyes off Brie.

  “Okay,” Cindy complains. “Just please get over here.” I hang up with my finger touching the screen and peer over at Brie. “I have to go. A little emergency.”

  “I understand.”

  I call Lily over to tell her we have to leave and take her hand in mine.

  “Daddy?”

  Lily saturates the stillness with her innocent voice as we make our way down the dimly lit hallway. I stop mid-step to gaze down at my beautiful niece.

  “What is it, pumpkin?” I ask, hoisting her up in my arms.

  “Can Mrs. Brie come to my birthday party and take pictures?” Lily grins, clutching my neck as she peeks at Brie.

  God, what a brilliant idea!

  I shift my attention to Brie, who’s standing inches from me, nervously tucking her hair behind her ear as her eyes make a furtive sweep up in my direction. Her presence makes my heart explode, knowing I can’t even have her in the way I want. There are moments in life I wish the world worked differently so that certain people came into our lives sooner rather than later. I’m staring at one person whom I wish I had met under different circumstances.

  There is something there. She feels it, too.

  “I don’t know, Lily. Mrs. Brie may already have plans for the Fourth of July.” My breath stalls, as I watch her expectantly, internally pleading she will attend.

  She dithers and reaches out and straightens Lily’s dress. “I don’t have any plans right now, but I’m sure I can make it work. You have become one of my favorite customers.”

  “Really?!” Lily shrieks. “You can come over to my house, and I can show you my room. It’s the prettiest room in the house. That’s what Daddy says!”

  “I would love to see your room.”

  We spend the next five minutes in Brie’s office going over the details of the party, which will last a couple of hours. I notice her wedding picture sitting on her desk and several black and white photos hanging on her wall and nothing else.

  Does she have any family? Brothers or sisters?

  I’ve learned plenty about her today, and I don’t want to come off intrusive, so I leave it alone. We argue back and forth about pricing, knowing she’s trying to give me a deal. Brie finally sees it my way, and we pay what anyone else would pay for her services.

  My phone rings as I’m signing my name on the dotted line.

  I fish for my phone and read a pissy text from Cindy asking me why I’m taking so long. I shoot her a quick response and shove the phone back into my pocket.

  “I have to go. It seems that whatever is going on at the flower shop has escalated.”

  “Well, you better get going. I can take care of the rest of the details.” She closes the file and rises from behind the desk. Placing her hands on her hips, she gazes down at Lily who is standing in front of her. “We’re going to have a lot of fun. Right, Lily?” She bends at her knees to tuck a lose curl behind Lily’s ear.

  “Yes!” Lily squeals, throwing her arms around Brie’s neck. “Miss Brie is the best. Right, Daddy?” She shoots me the most adorable grin.

  “She sure is, pumpkin.”

  “Well, I think you’re pretty fabulous, too,” Brie says, blinking several time before she stands. I rise from my chair so that we’re standing so close her tantalizing scent covers me like a thin cloud of temptation. Her eyes search my face, and for a moment, I think about kissing her. Fuck, I can’t, but, damn, I want to.

  Taking Lily’s hand, I slowly walk to the door with Brie close behind, dimming the lights as we go. My time with her is slowly slipping away. I want to say something more as I open the door to leave.

  Do you want to meet for coffee? Can I take you out for a drink?

  But, this will never happen.

  “It was nice seeing you again,” she says, holding the front door open.

  “Yes, the pleasure is all mine.” I look at her—really look at her—and my head swirls with inner turmoil. She’s not gorgeous. I know gorgeous. The woman in my presence right now is absolutely flawless.

  “Are you okay?”

  “Yes.” A shiver rolls down my spine, and lust courses through my veins. My cheeks grow hot knowing I just got caught staring at her. “Just lost my train of thought is all.”

  A warm laugh escapes her lips. “I’ll call when the proofs are ready and about the birthday party.” She waves to Lily who’s pulling me by the hand.

  “That would be great. Have a good night.”

  “You, too.�
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  She waves and flips the sign from Open to Closed and shuts the door behind her. With a sigh, I look away, having no choice but to save my cousin from disaster and walk away from the one woman who makes me feel something I haven’t felt in over four years. More than lust, something deeper. I know what it is, but it can’t be reciprocated.

  James’ blue eyes narrow into deep blue daggers as he stares at his laptop, his back propped and relaxed against fluffy black silk pillows on our ruffled king-sized bed. My eyes trail ravenously down his godlike body while memories of last night ravage my mind like a violent lightning storm. My own body wrapped in a fluffy white cotton towel is sore and sated, still reeling from the long night of lovemaking, which was rough, gentle, and everything in between. Yoga has done wonders with what I can do in bed, and my husband is reaping the benefits from it just as much as I am.

  My eyes make their eager return to his face where I notice he’s watching me with a lazy smile playing on his lips.

  “Those are naughty thoughts clouding those brown eyes,” he says in a husky voice.

  “Maybe...” My lips curve into a suggestive grin. “Why? Do you want to make them a reality?”

  “You know me. I’m here to make all your dreams a reality.” He pulls the corner of his bottom lip into his mouth, and his eyes roam over my body making me feel naked. “And mine.”

  “So selfish,” I muse, enjoying the lust in James’ gaze as I stand in front of him. I shudder at the carnal thoughts that take over my mind of James inside me.

  “I am when it comes to you,” he says as types something on his laptop.

  “You were the devil last night.”

  “I could say the same about you…devious and fucking flexible.”

  “Is it a problem?” I ask in a teasing tone, throwing a hand on my hip.

  “Never. Keep doing what you’re doing with the yoga classes.” He winks, returning his attention to the laptop for a second before asking, “Babe, before I forget, how do you feel about a party at our house on the Fourth of July?”

  “Really?”

  “Well, yeah, nothing major…just a little get-together with some people from my office. Our friends. What do you think? First house party.”

  “Sure…why not.”

  A brick wall of nervousness hits me full force. The thought of people mingling in our home for the first time seems daunting. We’ve been so busy the past year with our careers we’ve rarely had anyone over. Life has been fine, just James and me for the most part. Until recently.

  Am I going to be able to swing this party? Be the “hostess with the mostess” with a smile on my face, catering and schmoozing with our guests, meeting people from his office I’ve met briefly since he started his job?

  I have no desire to do this, but I can’t say no. James’ parents will be there, so I will need to put on my game face, especially for his mother, who has always thought I was not good enough for him, but James loves me and never once has he faltered in his feelings for me when it comes to her.

  “Brie? Are you there?” He waves his hand, trying to get my attention. He closes his laptop, throws his legs over the edge of the bed, and makes his way to me. I snap out of my trance when his arms envelop me, and his erection presses against my stomach as he pulls the towel from my body, letting it pool on the floor at our feet. I sense the subtle shift in the air, the raw desire consuming the room.

  I blink and smile up at him, loving the look in his eye, the one that says I have his full attention as he plans to be very attentive. I feather my fingers over his abs, trailing them to the band of his boxers. I lower my hand to the hard outline of his erection and stroke him through his boxers as a flash of terrible mischief passes over his eyes.

  Grabbing my hair, he exposes my neck, allowing his lips to travel recklessly up to mine. I open my lips to welcome him and begin to kiss him earnestly, his tongue tangling with mine as his hands grip my ass.

  “Are you with me now?” he rasps into my ear, turning me so that my back is flush against his chest. My breaths are labored, anticipating the feel of his hands on me.

  “Yes.” I lean against him, the warmth slowly saturating the apex of my legs. Towering over me from behind, he lightly grazes my arms with the pads of his fingertips, raking over my skin in soft circles. I shiver under his touch, my breath coming out in quick pants. “I’d rather spend the holiday alone, just you and me in bed doing nothing, but doing everything to each other.”

  I don’t care about anything but this man in front of me. The man who wants me.

  “Yeah...”

  He grasps my hips, letting his front mold with my back. I melt into the hard contours of his chest and close my eyes and enjoy the feeling of his arms around me. His fingers splay along my belly and up my chest. My heart pounds harder. Every time he touches me, it feels like I’m in a dream.

  “You’re gorgeous, Brie. I love everything about your body.” He gently massages my shoulders with his fingertips.

  “What about the party?” I tease, pressing my ass into him as the fire between my thighs burns hotter. “Will your parents be there? You know how they like to travel during the summer.”

  “Don’t worry about Mother. I can handle her. I’m thinking about someone and something else right now.” James remains silent for a second as he peppers my skin with delicious kisses. “I want you.” He reaches down between my legs and discovers the evidence of my arousal. His fingers slide though my folds. I can hear the wet sounds as he pumps his finger inside me. “You’re so fucking wet, B.”

  He withdraws his finger from my flesh and brings it to his mouth, sucking on it and savoring my taste. He smiles tenderly as he rubs his finger across my lips. “Say you want me, like I want you.” He brings his hand back to my core and enters me with two fingers this time, stretching me beautifully. Throwing my head back against his shoulder, I can’t help groaning as his movements become forceful. “Say it. B.”

  “I fucking want you, James. I want you,” I whisper softly against his lips. My voice doesn’t sound like mine, but needy and desperate. He kisses me. It’s short, but I can’t stop the reaction of my body the moment our mouths come together.

  “Get on the bed on all fours, baby,” he orders huskily.

  I do as I’m instructed. He slides his dick along my entrance, rubbing himself against me. “You definitely want me to fuck you,” he says in a cocky voice as he rests his hand on my lower back. I can feel when he slides his dick all the way inside me. His thrusts are slow and methodical as he takes his time. A moan escapes my mouth as his hand reaches between my legs to rub my sensitive skin. Everything becomes a blur of heady sensations, as I get lost in the feel of his hand and his body against mine.

  “Please,” I whimper, pushing my ass against him. “Oh, James...”

  He increases the tempo of his thrusts, driving us closer to our climax. As his breathing accelerates, I can hear myself panting louder and louder.

  “Fuck, your pussy is so fucking tight. You’re so close, B.” He puts his lips next to my ear and rasps, “Come for me, Brie. Come for me now.” His free arm snakes around my waist, holding me in place, and in the next moment, my body and my mind explode into a million diamond chips. I ride the wave of ecstasy that passes through every nerve, shooting down my limbs and blurring my vision. His speed doesn’t abate as he continues to thrust toward his climax, driving to the finish line, grinding against my clit. “That’s it, Brie. Fuck, that’s...it...” His voice breaks as he comes, shoving deeper into me as his climax erupts.

  I collapse onto the bed, my body limp and numb. He falls beside me and gathers me in his arms to spread kisses down my face as our breaths start to calm at a slow pace. As I run my hand through his hair, his mouth lowers to my neck.

  “Was I able to keep your attention this time?”

  “You will always have my attention if you fuck me like that every morning.” I grin as I press my breasts into him, needing to feel him with every part of my body. />
  His eyes darken as his hands stroke the dip and curve of my waist to my hip. He pulls me into him where I feel his erection against my thigh.

  “That can be arranged.”

  James’ aftershave lingers in the air as I descend the stairs and enter the airy kitchen where he’s sitting at the table reading the Sunday paper and drinking coffee. Tying the sash of my black silk robe around my waist, I approach him as he sets down his paper. He gives me a soft smile, and I reciprocate it.

  “Good morning, babe.”

  I lean down, kissing him and tasting the savory coffee on his lips. I turn around to grab myself a cup of coffee, but James’ hands grab my waist from behind and pull me back to sit on his lap.

  “Didn’t you get enough this morning?”

  “I want to have you in every room.” He nudges my ass with his erection.

  “I think we’ve done it here several times already,” I tease, playfully swatting his face.

  “Really.”

  He starts to untie the sash on my robe, and when his hand makes contact with my bare skin, arousal spreads through me. His hand begins to trace an upward path on my leg, closer to my throbbing core.

  “James.” I lean my head back against his shoulder. “You mentioned something about a get- together earlier.” I close my eyes when he touches me over the silk of my thong.

  “I did?” He feigns ignorance while nibbling on my earlobe. “Oh, yeah.” Kissing the corner of my mouth, he draws away and strokes his finger through my hair, pulling it away from my face.

  “How many people do you plan on inviting?” I ask, rising to fix myself a cup of coffee.

  “I don’t know.” He frowns at losing contact. “I’m thinking some people from the office and some old friends from high school. Not many and anyone you want to invite.”

  “Well, I guess I can invite Ava and Ashley.” I grab a mug from the cabinet and pour myself some coffee, admiring the sun as it bathes the kitchen with golden rays. It’s a perfect summer morning. Life couldn’t be more perfect.